It is unfortunate..

that when Ally wants to tell her sister good night, we have to come here.

Matt and I are always wondering how things might be different if Cosette was still with us. Would Ally behave differently? Would we be any different? I know for sure that the hole in my heart will be there until I see her again. That isn't going away. The pain I feel can be pushed aside when life is busy. When things start to slow down it all comes to surface. I miss my girl. Ally really misses her sister and tells me this all the time. I have gotten past the whole "why'd this have to happen" and have moved on to "how can I improve this crappy situation". Well I can't improve this situation, but my Heavenly Father can help ease the pain. I am so grateful for the gospel and the knowledge that I have that I will see her again. Matt and I were sealed in the temple for time and eternity and our kids will be with us because of the righteous choice we made. I love my kids. They really are great. I just wish I could have them all here together. It'd be so much better having all of them here and it being total chaos, than having this cruddy hole in my heart. Miss you sweet girl!