Monday, March 30, 2009


Do you ever wish the bed fairy or dish fairy would come down and make your beds and do your dishes? Well I normally don't wish for these fairies, but lately have been hoping one fairy in particular would come down and do something for me. Matt and I still need to go pick out Cosette's headstone. I really wish the headstone fairy would come down and just do it for me. It is the one last thing we have left to do and it seems to keep getting pushed to the back of our to-do list. I'm not looking forward to doing this as it is the LAST thing we have left to do. But I want her to have a headstone, so I need to just go and do it. Yesterday in Sacrament meeting we sang I Know that My Redeemer Lives as the closing song and I made it through the first verse barely and had to just sit there for the next 3 verses as my eyes welled up with tears. When Ally was a baby I could sing this song anytime and she would stop crying, with Cosette anytime I sang it I started to feel emotional so I'd just stop singing and sing something like I love to see the Temple or I am a Child of God. Yesterday in church it hit me and I was NOT ready for it. It was fast and testimony Sunday and I was going to get up and bear my testimony, but really felt like I was not going to make it through without sobbing, so hopefully when the next one comes around I won't be so emotional. I won't be pregnant on the next fast Sunday, so that might help.
I am looking forward to next weekend and dreading it at the same time. I love General Conference and have been looking forward to it since Cosette passed away. I am hoping to time Ally's nap right, so that we can watch a whole session and then have my brothers watch her for the afternoon ones (they'd normally be sleeping through it, so they might as well do something useful). One of my sisters had a dream that Bensons birthday was/is April 5, so I am kinda hoping that is true, we'll see. I am dreading Sunday for the fact that it will be 4 months since Cosette left us and it's been on my mind a lot lately. I think just as my due date gets closer and my emotions are right at the surface, it just brings up lots of feelings. I love talking about my little angel. My hope is that when I talk about her it helps me forget less. It helps me work through my emotions and feelings I have about what happened. I miss Cosette so much and today I just can't help but wonder why she had to leave us so early. I accept that it was her time to go back to Heavenly Father, but I don't feel like I had enough time with her. I guess this is true for any person that passes away, but more so for a child. You/I are/am always going to feel like there wasn't enough time. I am just so thankful for those 15 months we had with her and the knowledge that I will see her again. I will get to raise her starting at the age she was when she left us. I just wish that I was raising her here with her siblings. I had such hopes and dreams for Ally and Cosette, growing up so close in age. Knowing that Ally gets to grow up without her sister and not really remembering and knowing Cosette, crushes me.
Okay, on to a happier note....
For those of you that have had children, did you try anything special that worked for you when it came to inducing labor? I am not wanting to do the castrol oil or herbs, but am up for foods. I've heard pineapple and watermelon help, has anyone else heard this? I am just getting tired of so many bathroom breaks (at least one an hour during the day and every other hour at night) and the constant back pain. I'm not trying to complain, but these 2 things are just starting to wear me down. Starting on Wednesday I am going to start doing everything I can to get this little guy out. Ally and I pulled the wii fit out on Saturday and did hula hoop, step aerobics, and did a run 3 times. For some reason he still wanted to stay put, we'll see how he feels after I do this every day this week.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

How much water do you drink/day?

The last 2 months I have been drinking a lot of water. I'm pregnant and that's normal, but as of lately it seems like my water intake has gone up drastically. For the longest time I couldn't drink water during the night, so I'd have to drink orange juice. Now I just crave water during the night. Last night every time I got up to go to the bathroom I drank 10 oz of water. So by this morning I'd had 30 oz of water. That is just during the night. I am drinking somewhere between 60-90 oz of just water during the day, that doesn't include milk, gatorade, and orange juice. Normally I don't drink this much liquid, so is this normal? I guess it is good though that I am drinking a lot, I just don't want to drown myself.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

36 week appt and an AWESOME massage

I had a dr appt yesterday and he was kind enough to inform me that I am HUGE. Thanks dude! I already knew that. I have a month to go and you think I am HUGE now, just wait. He is thinking that this little guy will definetely be bigger than Ally was, if I have him a week early. YIKES! Ally was a week late and 9lbs 2 oz. I don't even want to think how big this guy could be. There are some women who give birth to newborns and others (like me) give birth to infants. I would sometime like to be one that gives birth to a newborn. I am not really complaining though. My kids have been born healthy, except for the acid reflux, which isn't a huge issue.

Last night I went and got what I hope was my last massage for this pregnancy (from a professional, you're not off the hook yet Matt!). It was so nice and relaxing. If you ask Matt I could honestly be massaged all day and it still wouldn't seem like enough. I love back rubs, massages, getting my back scratched and most of all a scalp massage. Oh the scalp massage is super nice. One of my sisters use to make fun of me and say I was like a dog because I enjoyed having my head massaged. My body still this morning feels relaxed, for the most part. I love getting pampered and could totally see myself going to a spa every month, if the budget allowed for it. Anyways, here's my plug- If you are pregnant, go get a massage, you'll feel fabulous. If you aren't pregnant, go get a massage, you'll feel fabulous. I am planning on going back after I have this baby, just so I know what it's like to get a massage and not be pregnant. There was a lady there last night that had just gotten done with a massage and was talking about how great the deep tissue massage is and I was like, I could go for that now, but I have to get the mommy to be massage. Someday...someday...another massage will be in my future.

Monday, March 23, 2009


Ally loves to sing and be sung to. Her favorites right now are:

Heavenly Father are you really there?

Love is Spoken Here


I am a Child of God


Sonic has the best cranberry limeade. Ally and I went there today after nap time. We left with a grape slush, ocean water, large cup of ice, and a cranberry limeade. Ally didn't like her slush and didn't want to try the ocean water because it was blue. Go figure. I love the ice at sonic. They have the little bits of ice and they are so yummy.

A great Sunday to do hair

So this little idea has been in my head for awhile. I was quite pleased with how it turned out. As with every time I do Ally's hair, I end up changing things around as I'm working on her hair. The 2 braids in the middle I had planned on just being 1, but found it much easier to just separate them. If you can't tell there are 2 hearts with the braids. She sat super still for me and was very cooperative.

She thought that with her dress and her hair done, she was a ballerina. So this is what she did until we got to church. Her white shoes, were scuffed up before we even got to the car. Yesterday was the first day she even wore them. I think next year, I might invest in better quality shoes, in hopes of being able to get the scuffs out. These shoes, once they're scuffed, they're scuffed.

Silly girl
We were trying to get her to be serious and she stuck her tongue out just as the flash went off.
Daddy and Ally
Mommy and Ally and Benson
Ben is definetely making his presence known. I have 4 1/2 weeks left. I am pretty much out of shirts. What fit me with Ally, barely fit me at the end with Cosette, and is definetely not fitting now. I really don't want to buy more shirts, just for the last few weeks. So if you see me out and about and think to yourself, her shirts just aren't cutting it, I am very well aware. I try to wear the ones that BARELY cover my tummy, when we go out and leave the ones that don't cover everything for the days we just stay home.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Missing her

Tonight I am really missing Cosette. Actually all day I've been missing her. I've found over the last few weeks that Friday is usually a down day for me. Cosette left us on a Friday and somehow, every Friday I really notice she's not here. I miss her spirit, her laugh, her smell, cuddling with her, and just being in her presence. She's my angel baby now and I can't wait to see her again. As I get closer to my due date, I feel sad knowing that I won't be able to see Cosette with her little brother. I know she's with him and they are great buddies, but I am not going to be able to see them together for a long time (at least in my mind it's going to be a long time). There are so many milestones that I can think of that she would have reached by now. As we've been trying to figure out Ally's bowels, my mom pointed out that with everything we've tried, Cosette would have mastered potty training by now. That's just how she was. She was very determined to do just as well or better than Ally. I love that about her, she's so determined and strong willed. I miss hearing her say "no" ALL the time. I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for the opportunity that we had to have her with us and get to know her. We are looking so forward to the second coming when we can see her and raise her. I can't wait for that day when I can wrap her up in my arms and just tell her how much she was missed and how much we love her. I know she's watching us and praying for us to choose the right everyday. I am so grateful for eternal families and knowing that we will be together again. My heart is aching so much right now. I am going to have lots of good days mixed in with a few not so good days. Today (tonight mainly) is one of those not so good days for me.
Tomorrow should be a much better day. One of my good friends is having a baby shower for me. I am really excited about it.

Monday, March 16, 2009


We had a fun Saturday. Matt played basketball in the morning. Ally and I went shoe shopping while Matt was playing basketball. We took a nap, then ate a late lunch at Olive Garden (soo yummy). We drove around looking at houses, then went home and played in the backyard.
Ally had fun digging in the dirt, looking for bugs and worms.
Matt entertained himself with a soccer ball.
The weather was nice and we were glad to be outside enjoying it.

Girls Day

Friday was strictly Girls Day! Ally and I have been on a HUGE hunt for a blessing outfit for Benson. I HAD found one and was going to buy it when I saw it, but my mom and Matt both told me to wait, it was too early to buy it. I REALLY wanted to get it, but decided to listen to them and wait. Well, they quit carrying that line and anything cotton in a blessing outfit. So since then, I have been on a mad hunt for an outfit. I needed something cotton (so we could put his name and blessing date on it) and I know I can clean cotton (just in case he has a blow out in the outfit). All you can find in the stores now is polyester and satin, neither of which I wanted. I ended up finding a cute little outfit on Friday when Tiff came shopping with Ally and I. We had a good time and it was a successful trip. I am SOO glad I don't have to spend anymore time on the internet looking for an outfit.
Anyways, so it was girls day on Friday because Matt had to take the van to get it fixed and we weren't sure if he'd be back late Friday night for early Saturday. Ally and I bought HSM 2 when we were at the Disney Store, then we went to Sonic and ate a late lunch, went to the park, then went to Wal-Mart and got cotton candy, cookies, and root beer. We had a fun night watching the movie and eating junk. We went to bed at a reasonable time and Matt ended up getting home at 11pm, so he moved Ally to her bed.

Monday, March 09, 2009

My birthday!!

This is my birthday present from Matt. I love it. It is soo comfy.
Someone else really likes it too!

I also got binoculars, 2 seasons of Full House, the game Mad Gab, money, and giftcards. Thanks everyone for making it such a great birthday.
So today is actually the big day, but I got to celebrate it Saturday and Sunday.
This morning after my shower I got SUPER dizzy, so I went and layed down and ended up sleeping for 40 minutes, thanks Ally. She was watching the disney channel while I was trying to recoop. Normally she comes in and talks to me every few minutes, but not today, she must know its my birthday!

Tuesday, March 03, 2009


On Saturday I took Ally to the pediatrician because her cough had gotten worse. She has an ear infection in her right ear and a head cold that is causing her cough. Whenever she is sick you usually can't tell because it doesn't slow her down much. Last night however was a different story. She was up like every hour crying. I am exhausted now. She'd wake herself up with nasty sounding coughs, then start crying. I'd go in there to calm her down and that'd take a bit of patience on mine and Matts part. Oh the joys of sick kids. At least she isn't like this every time she's sick.
Last night for dinner I made a super yummy soup. I called my sister to see if she wanted to come over and eat with me, since Matt was at school. She was here super fast because she was so excited about my soup.

Chicken, Black Bean and Spinach Enchilada soup
2t. olive oil
1-2 (or more) boneless, skinless chicken breasts chopped really small
1/2 onion chopped
2 c. low sodium chicken broth
1 1/2 c. skim milk
1 can low fat low sodium cream of chicken soup
10 oz chopped, fresh spinach
1 can black beans, drained
1 can kidney beans, drained
1 1/2 t. chili powder
1 1/2 t. cumin
handful frozen corn
2-3 chopped tomatoes
1/4 c shredded low fat cheese

Saute chicken in oil 6-7 minutes. Add onion and cook 1-2 more minutes. Stir in remaining ingredients. Bring to a boil and cook over low heat for 10 minutes, or until spinach is done. Good with shredded cheese on top and tortilla chips.
This recipe came from my friend Lynelle.

Wii Fit

So Matt mentioned a few weeks ago that he wanted to get a Wii Fit. His parents got him the Wii for Christmas, so I figured we could get the fit to go with it. As a side note: if you're pregnant and your balance is quite off, like mine, then don't attempt the fit. It is fun, its fun to watch, but not when you are front heavy. Ally really enjoys doing the fit with Matt. She tells him what she wants to do and that she will watch him first, then its her turn. Other than the video of her running, when she is standing on the balance board, she is just standing there, she doesn't quite get that you have to move your body around (put more weight on certain spots of your feet). Matt sits behind her and pushes on it, so she thinks she is moving.